Gay, Catholic and parents of three

Posted on March 23, 2007
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The challenges of raising three children in the Maguire-Newman home are much the same as those faced in suburban America across the country. The Catholic household, two parents with three school-age children, springs to life at 7 a.m. on most days. While one parent makes breakfast and packs lunches, the other makes beds and monitors homework assignments.

“My observation is that children are a lot more receptive to work and instruction in the first 90 minutes before they have enough energy to be resistant,” says Gregory Maguire, a celebrated author of children’s literature. He is best known for the widely popular novel Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West, a bestseller written for adults that has been adapted into a Tony Award-winning hit musical.

Maguire is quick to explain, “It’s not because we want them to be superstars” nor do they have “serious learning problems.” Rather, he said, it’s a matter of “keeping up in a highly functioning school system in which we find ourselves.”

All three children — two boys and a girl, ages 5, 6 and 9 — were adopted from countries in Latin America and Southeast Asia. They are by Maguire’s account “noisy, smart and obedient within a range,” having settled comfortably into an all-American way of life, with interests varying from ballet and piano to soccer and computer games. They are well-liked by their friends, Maguire said, adding, “We have yet to hear or face in nine years living in Concord any resistance to us as a gay couple with a family.”

Maguire and his partner, artist Andy Newman, are not only a gay couple raising children, but they are legally married under a new law in Massachusetts, the only state with equal marriage rights for lesbians and gay men.

[Maguire was scheduled speak about his story as a gay parent and a sacramental church at New Ways Ministry’s Sixth National Symposium on Catholicism and Homosexuality March 16-18 in Minneapolis. New Ways Ministry describes itself as “a gay-positive ministry of advocacy and justice for lesbian and gay Catholics.”]

The Maguire and Newman clan is part of a changing landscape of contemporary American family life. More than 8,500 same-sex couples have married in Massachusetts since May 2004, including many with children. Nationwide, estimates of lesbian and gay parents range from 2 million to 8 million.

But a political battle to roll back civil-marriage rights for gays looms. Massachusetts state lawmakers have voted to send a proposed constitutional same-sex marriage ban to voters. If the legislature approves the measure again, this year or next, voters would have the final say in November 2008. Read more….

Source: National Catholic Reporter

First N.J. same-sex couples say ‘I do’

Posted on February 23, 2007
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On the first day most same-sex couples were able to join in civil unions under a new state law, several towns across Central Jersey reported applications from residents and ceremonies scheduled during the next few days.

Shortly after midnight Thursday, two Lambertville residents vowed to “share their lives openly with each other in a committed and binding relationship,” becoming one of the first same-sex couples in New Jersey to unite under the civil union law.

The ceremony for Beth Asaro and Joanne Schailey in front of a packed crowd at the Lambertville Justice Center took place exactly 72 hours after they filled out the application for the civil union early Monday morning. State law requires the waiting period for civil marriages and civil unions.

Asaro said the couple met through mutual friends and one of the first things Schailey said was, “I’m not going to get serious.” They have since been together for 20 years and registered as domestic partners in 2004, just five days after that state law went into effect.

Mayor David DelVecchio performed the ceremony, at the end declaring Asaro and Schailey to be “lawfully joined in a civil union. We’re sending a message that we follow the law and we embrace the law,” said DelVecchio, who is also president of the state League of Municipalities.

Some mayors have said they will give up performing civil marriages in order to avoid performing civil unions, though DelVecchio said the majority of 566 mayors in the state will likely comply with the law.

In Dunellen, Mayor Robert Seader said he was on the fence about performing civil union because of his religious beliefs, but changes to how the state allows mayors to collect fees for such ceremonies made him decide against performing the unions. One couple in Dunellen has applied for a civil union, officials said.

Same-sex couples who had already secured civil unions or marriages in other states were allowed to forgo the 72-hour waiting period, but the civil union between Asaro and Schailey was the first in the state, or at least among the first, for those unable to take advantage of that waiver. Other late-night ceremonies took place in Asbury Park and South Orange.

Along with Vermont and Connecticut, New Jersey is the third state in the nation where same-sex couples can join in a civil union. Massachusetts allows same-sex marriage.

The law — signed by Gov. Jon S. Corzine on Dec. 21 and effective 60 days later — followed a landmark state Supreme Court decision in October mandating that same-sex couples be given the same rights as married couples. New Jersey’s law does that, but without the title “marriage.”

While celebrating the law as a step forward, some activists and members of the gay community argue the civil union designation is still unequal and have pledged to continue pushing for marriage. Others are calling for an amendment to the state constitution to prohibit same-sex marriage.

Since Monday, officials in Bernards, Clinton Town, Clinton Township, Hillsborough, Raritan Borough, Readington and South Plainfield have also reported civil union applications.

Besides Asaro and Schailey, two couples from New Hope, Pa., and another from Rehoboth Beach, Del., have applied for civil unions in Lambertville, according to Municipal Clerk Loretta Buckelew. Once the couples apply for civil unions in their respective towns, the ceremonies will likely be divided between the mayor, council president and municipal judge, Buckelew said.

The mayor is expected to perform three civil unions for non-Lambertville residents on Friday as well as a marriage, according to the clerk’s office. Since Wednesday, five more couples from out of state have made informal inquiries about civil unions in Lambertville, officials said.

A pianist in the back of the room extended his set to help burn off four extra minutes until Buckelew, as a clerk, could legally sign the civil union license at 12:01 a.m. DelVecchio signed the license using one of the black and gold pens that Corzine used to sign the civil union bill into law last year.

Nearing the end of hectic week, Asaro said the very public way the couple decided to cement their relationship was possible because of an accepting environment in Lambertville, where they have lived for 10 years.

“I wouldn’t open myself up to this if I lived anywhere but Lambertville, I think I would have been too scared,” Asaro said. “But this community has been so welcoming, it wasn’t hard to take the leap.”

Source: Courier News

‘Civil unions, great, but we want marriage’

Posted on February 23, 2007
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Same-sex couples celebrate and rally at City HallThursday marked the first day for same-sex couples living in New Jersey to officially hold civil union ceremonies. The law allowing for civil unions was signed by Governor Jon Corzine in December, but went into effect on Monday.

In Jersey City, that meant couples were going into the City Clerk’s Office to fill out their applications for a civil union. After a 72-hour waiting period, they received their licenses. Jersey City City Clerk Robert Byrne said that as of 10 a.m. Thursday, 15 applications were filled out.

Later that day, according to Walt Boraczek, president of the Hudson Diversity Action Council, at least two Jersey City couples were planning to get married in private once they got their licenses.

Boraczek, a gay man, does not have a partner, but was enthusiastic about what transpired last week. “The whole week of events has been a long time coming,” said Boraczek. “I think people did take advantage, especially if you were a couple who had been together for so long.”

Those who want to dissolve a civil union can follow the same procedures that heterosexual couples follow for divorce. That, Byrne explained, means filing papers in State Superior Court and the court would have to adjudicate if there is alimony and custody of children involved. Read more….

Source: The Hudson Reporter

Posted on December 15, 2006
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